“False Friends”

My Czech mother-in-law spent some time with us last week and I am so proud to say that I was able to communicate with her in Czech without any difficulty during those times.  Gone were the days when we had to resort to body language just to be able to express what we wanted to say.  My Czech grammar isn’t perfect, but my language proficiency is at a level where I can communicate and be understood.

New Czech Step by Step: A Basic Course in the Czech Language for English-speaking Foreigners

However, in my continuing quest to learn the Czech language, I would have to say that one of the most challenging aspects is the existence of “false friends”  These are words that may sound similar in English and Czech but entirely have different meanings.  Thanks to this book, I can now refer to some of these words when confronted with a situation where I am not really sure about the meaning.

Here is an illustration of my point.  Although English words such as doctor and medicine are also doktor and medicina in Czech, other medically important words have “false friends.”  For example, if you want to say “ambulance, ” you cannot say ambulance (pronounced ambu-lan-tse)  because it means outpatient department.  The proper term is sanitka  which might be confused with sanitary in English.  In Czech, kontrola means check-up which can be confused with control in English.

You might hear somebody say he/she finished highschool in a gymnazium because a gymnazium is a secondary school, not a gym.   List is a leaf or a piece of paper in Czech.  Seznam is the proper word to use if you want to say list, as in list of things to buy or list of things to do.   While a host is the one who is hosting a party, a host is a guest in Czech.  A šéf  (pronounced “chef”) is not a chef but a boss.   The one who makes the food is a kuchař.

And never ever say kurva if you want to say curve because it means whore in Czech.  The proper term is křivka.  But perhaps the funniest “false friend” is preservativ  which you may confuse as preservative in food but actually means condom in Czech.  Preservative in food is konzervační in Czech.

About 2 years ago, I had my own funny experience with these “false friends” at a conversation with an older woman who was my former neighbor in the other house we used to live in.  In one of our small talks, I told her I was cooking pasta (toothpaste in Czech)  for dinner.

My Little Comic

A few days after he was born, he already knew how to pose.

Don’t you just love the innocence of a child?  Here are a few snippets of my encounters with my almost 2yr old boy.

One morning after getting out of bed, Jakub picked up his toy cellphone and said:  “Babi, mlecinko is gone.”  (Grandma, milk is gone)

To stop him from climbing the cabinet, I told Jakub:  “Don’t climb this or mommy will be mad at you.”  I then went to his bedroom to ventilate his windows.  When I came back, he was already carrying a chair so he can open the cabinet.  Knowing that it was still wrong, he looked guiltily at me as he exclaimed:  “Mommy, ne mad at you.”

Tommy, Jakub’s cousin who is the same age as he, has blond hair.  Whenever he sees blond-haired boys (which is 50% of all the boys in the playground),  he calls them Tommy.

To lure him to sleep, I told Jakub that I will make palacinky when he wakes up.  I then proceeded to ask:  “Do you like palacinky?”  He responded:  “Ne.  Ice cream”

Jakub calls our car “taxi” because he gets to sit in the back.

So I can do household tasks, I oftentimes let Jakub watch educational videos.  On a Barney show, children were pointing at things and identifying what they were: “it’s a bird,” “it’s a rainbow,” “it’s a plane….” Jakub, tugging his diaper said: “It’s kaka (poop).”

Who needs to go to a comedy club when I have a comedian at home.